Thursday, March 27, 2008

What clothes make you a Hoochie?

Last week, I ventured to target with my hubby and kid. In the parking lot, I saw this lady who wore a halter top, a jean short and some strappy gold sandals. Something was not right with her outfit. Never mind the revealing top, or too short short; the shoes just were too much. I then turned to my husband to ask him what he considers to be hoochie shoes. he nonchalantly responded that Mariah Carey's shoes were hoochie shoes. That comment made me laugh to tears. But it made me think as well. What kind of clothes make you a hoochie, or at least make you look like one.
When I got home, I went on to Google images of Mariah Carey. And I found a set that were very interesting. In most of the images on Google, Miss Carey is barely covered. And the shoes, like these ones on the pic say it all.
(After rehearsal for the Fashion Rocks 5- theybf.com)


Let us forget about Miss Carey a bit and re-focus on the subject of this article: Hoochie clothing.
We should start by explaining what is a hoochie. The urban dictionary defines a hoochie as "a female who dresses ghetto ho fabulous. Lots of gold, lots of weave-typically Pattie LaBelle style with red, purple, gold, or orange streaks, and long nails with lots of airbrush glitter, and color. This female's goal in life is to use her female attributes to obtain a male with lots of money or any money to spend on her. Weaves, rent, & diapers for her baby from another daddy included."
This definition is very interesting. I am happy to see that I do not qualify as a hoochie then. OUF!
So according to this definition, we can now stress out what I consider to be "Hoochie Clothing":
1- Skinny jeans or hipster jeans. These jeans are so tight that the stitches may pop. They often accentuate the bottom, which is for some girls, one of their best features. Moreover, they are so low at the back that sitting without revealing your ass is mission impossible. Actually for some girls, this effect is very much desired when they are wearing a sexy thong.
2-Tops that reveal everything. And by everything I mean breasts, stomach, and belly button. Those tops are usually in every color you can find, and the fabric is very stretchy or sheer.


3-too short shorts or skirts. Usually they like it in jean fabric. But those shorts are so short that they reveal the buttocks. It is gross. No one need to see that.

4-Too tight dresses (and short at the same time)
What can I say. Unless you are a hoochie yourself, this is not the type of dress you would wear to a baby shower, wedding or prom. Or anywhere for that matter unless you are selling yourself at the corner of the street at 1 PM at night.
5- shoes that have straps, have glass heels, gold heels, and are way too high. They are called stripper shoes. You can find them in lingerie and sex toys shops.

More items of the clothing family could have made this list according to what part of the planet you are from. For example, fish nets are a big no-no in the U.S. but in Japan they are a big hit. However, I am stopping myself since I wanted to keep it simple in this article.

As far as I was concerned, I do not like hoochie clothing. I used to wear them when I was younger. But back then I was so naive that I did not know what was hoochie clothing. I thought I was being sexy and classy, well in fact I was revealing too much. I used to wear hipster jeans that would show my entire ass (or panties) when I sat. I loved sheer tops; I still love them but the difference is that now I wear them with a tank top underneath instead of a bra. And for clubbing, I would put on some strappy high heels whenever I feel like I needed to grow a few inches tall.
Now, that I am grown, I know that I can be sexy without being hoochie like. I know that I do not need to put it out there to get attention.

On a final note, remember that not only the clothing can make you look like a hoochie. I think that attitude also has a lot to do with it from the way you speak, chew your gum, to how you shake your jelly at the club. Basically the way you present yourself to the world can say a whole lot about yourself.

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